Benjamin Franklin said “There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond and to know oneself” – yet the key to developing your emotional and social intelligence is self-knowledge. This is the ability to understand what triggers your emotions and your subsequent reactions. It is about acknowledging your abilities, inner resources as well as your limits.

Some steps to achieving self-awareness are:

1. Be open to feedback. Seek it, understand the perspective of the person giving it and try to avoid being defensive. 360 degree feedbacks can give useful feedback and open your mind to your blind-spots.

2. Mindful reflection each day. What were the emotions felt and how did you react? What physical sensations did you experience? Subtle, fleeting emotions are as important as the deeper feelings you have engaged in. Writing a journal helps you record your reflections

3. Understand your dominant personality type. There are many and varied self-assessment tools available.  It is always best to do this through an accredited coach so that you get the best information from this assessment.  It is as important to understand the other “types” of the people you interact with and are therefore able to understand their perspective.

4. Remember the important 5:1 ratio – 5 affirmations to every 1 concern.  It is as important when reflecting on yourself as it is in giving feedback to others.